Family... a present from heaven - part II

I didn't plan on "part II" - it just happened.
On Sabbath, I was invited to eat lunch with a dear sister and her husband, who works in the library. They had invited 3 other friends and after lunch, they wanted to visit an orphanage together with the staff from the library. I was invited to join them and since I didn't have any plans for the afternoon, I did.

31 kids without parents or with parents who can't or don't want to take care of them. This little cute girl is the youngest one. She was left somewhere outside close to the orphanage wrapped in a blanket. She was still a baby back then and they found her because she was screaming like crazy. She's such a cutie... don't know how her parents could "throw her away". They might have had their reasons, but her timid smile makes your heart melt and hurt at the same time. She has a place to stay with people that love her - but one day she might have a hard time dealing with the fact that her parents didn't want her.

Well, we spent the afternoon singing, listening to stories from the bible, eating fruit salad and cake and playing games outside. We (the visitors) had fun, they had fun and before saying "Good bye", each one of them got a new pair of socks. I guess it wasn't my last time there since the library staff visit them on a regular basis. This afternoon showed me once again how blessed I am, having parents who love me and a family where I am at home.

Yesterday during evening worship, one of the (university) girls sat down next to me, laid her head on my shoulder and began to cry. I didn't know why and I had actually only talked to her once when she told me, that she liked my worships and that they had helped her. I let her cry but I had the feeling that she actually wanted to talk, so after worship we "hid" in the prayer room and I got to know her a bit better.

She's 18, first semester of nursery and doesn't feel "at home" here at all, but right after telling me about her problems with the other girls and in class, she told me about her family... and that she wanted a Daddy so bad. Her Dad had left her Mom when she was about a year. The last time she has seen her father is about 11 years ago. Her little brother has another father he doesn't really know either and she has a lot of unanswered questions: Why do others have their daddies but I don't? Why doesn't he want anything to do with me? Why can't I just move on? Why does it hurt so bad to see other girls with their daddies?

I couldn't answer all her questions but I could take the time to listen, allow her to cry without feeling small and weak, offer her my friendship and pray together with her. She declared me her Mom (at least for here since her Mom is far away in La Paz), so now I have a Bolivian daughter and a Bolivian grandchild (no, she doesn't have a child, but my 13-year old roommate Scarley calls me "Granny Marie").

I'm aparently not the only one who is looking for a "family" when far away from home. Scarley has her "whole family" here: aunties, mummies, sisters... well, and a grandmother... *lol* but if it makes her happy... It doesn't kill me to play the "Granny-part".

Is there somebody you know that needs a brother, sister, mother, father... or grandmother? Being thankful for you family and expressing it is step no.1, but don't stop there. Take it to the next level and use the opportunities God is giving you to be a true friend to the person who isn't as priviliged as you are. Pass the blessing on and... expect to be blessed.

I wish you a successful week!
maria

Family... a present from heaven

I’m back to the routine… bells at 5am and everything, but last weekend has been great. I’ve been just 10 min by car away from the university and even returned on Sunday morning for 5 min to get some of my material to study, but it wasn’t the distance that mattered. Freedom was one point, but there was another one even more important to me: Being part of a family! Washing dishes, slouching on the couch, eating with just 1-6 persons, talking in a relaxed atmosphere with no time pressure because you already should be in worship, bed or somewhere. Being at home!

The week before, I had been sick. Especially on Wednesday I didn’t feel great. I felt dizzy, weak, had fever and could neither really sleep in the night nor during the day. Making me fresh orange-lemon juice meant some major effort. That was when I thought, “I wish Mummy would be here and make me some!” Later that day, when cutting onions and some tomatoes I thought, “I wish Daddy would ask me if I wanted some tomato-cucumber salad” (his favorite food ever).” I only would have had to say, “I’ll take some, thank you!” Adding with puppy eyes, “And could you make a bowl for me with extra many onions and lot’s of lemon juice?”

I’ve never felt homesick but especially when I am sick, I love to feel at home. That’s why I was so happy when Cira visited me that Thursday and invited me to stay the weekend with them. But even when I’m not sick, I need this feeling of “belonging to a family” at least once in a while – no matter where in the world I am. I love to travel and I’m thankful that wherever I’ve been, I’ve found places where I could eat breakfast in pyjamas and with my “night hairdo”, places where I felt free to be just myself. I know that friends who are like parents or siblings are a present from heaven. That’s why I’m so thankful for Cira, Eufronio, Leany y Abraham (see pic) and I hope they know how much I appreciate them.

Mummy! Daddy! I know that Lydia has to translate for you but I just wanted to let you know: I love you! You’ll always have a special place in my heart that nobody else can occupy. You were the ones who have always been there when I’ve been sick. Thank you for all the cups of fresh orange juice and hot sage tea! Thank you for all the talks in the middle of the night. And it’s these “little things” that make me miss you here on the other side of the globe. But you can sleep quietly and without worries – Cira and Eufronio are taking care of me over here. You couldn’t ask for better substitute parents!

What else to say?
Since I had my first mid exams in all subjects this week, I didn’t have much time for writing blog entries (although – honestly – I didn’t study a lot). Each paragraph of this blog is actually written on another day. Today, I went to Quillacollo to refill my fruit and vegetable depot and when I was done, I thought I would check if Cira was at home. They are about to move to another place even closer to the university, so they’re not always at home, but this time, even Eufronio and Abraham were there and about to eat lunch. I ate with them, helped washing the dishes afterwards, talked with Cira for about an hour and got invited for next weekend… It’ll be hard to say “Good bye” in August!!! A lot harder than in 2003, 2004 and 2005!

Did you ever tell the people you appreciate the most how much you love them?
Don’t wait until it’s too late.

Love,
maria

Count the blessings!

I have a cold... the third time in less than 2 months... personal record!! This time was/is the worst one though. I could feel it on Tuesday, that it would be a "real cold", so I skipped my last two classes and headed to the market to get oranges, onions, lemons, pears, kiwifruits, apples, tomatoes and all that good stuff before I wasn't able to walk out of the dorm anymore. I was happy I made it back without tipping over... Today, I'm already feeling pretty good again. My voice is still fighting not to die completely and I'm still using mountains of tissue for my nose, but my head is feeling ok and the fever is gone. What amazed me - the deans just asked once if I had everything I needed and didn't even ask me if I wanted the doctor to see me. They allowed me to do my thing although this time I was actually really sick. They are improving... =)

In general, I have to say that my situation has improved a lot. There are still a lot of things I could complain about but I can see how God is giving me the things I need so I can grow and enjoy my semester here at the same time.

First, there are the things I couldn't really influence since I din't know enough about the situation. It's a real blessing for me that I am in "1st semester educational siences" and not in theology nor a teacher carreer. At first, I wanted to do one semester of theology but I feared, I would be a part of the female minority, having to keep the guys off... Now I'm really happy, I'm not doing theology...

Since I'll actually be a teacher, it would have been the most obvious choice to put me together with the teachers (who have their own institution that doesn't directly belong to the university UAB and is called INSA), but somehow I landed in "Educación" and since it was the easiest thing to put me in 1st semester (although I kind of belong into 9th or at least 7th semester), I didn't complain and was happy I would be an official student with just a visitors visa. What are the advantages of belonging to UAB intead of INSA? Well, I don't have to wear a uniform (blue skirt, white blouse) and I belong to the nicest church on campus with a sound system that doesnt't give me a headache (if the right people are in charge of it). Last Sabbath, we had the inauguration (see pic). It's a really nice building and since we use it for Wednesday and Friday night worship, Sabbath morning and Sabbath afternoon, it's a major improvement in my eyes. I never liked "the coliseo" - now "Church of INSA" - and the church for the highschoolers wasn't any better either (I attended it during my first 2 week here). The "University Church" is the best thing that could have happened to me! They don't have a real piano (..non of the churches here has one), but I can play the electric gran piano once in a while when I'm early for church and worship.
Being in 1st semester also has the advantage that the majority of my (male) classmates are significantly younger than me. They like me and I like them, but I don't have to "fear" them like the theology students...

What else?
It's a blessing that I'm living in the part for the high school students. Never thought it would be, but it is! My classes are in the afternoon, they have classes in the morning. This means that I have my peace in the morning and they can scream as much as they want in the afternoon. In the night, they cut down the electricity for the high school students at about 10.30pm, a time I really want to sleep if I have to get up at 5am. When I already enjoy a dark room, I can see all the rooms on the other side of the dorm bright and shining. Furthermore, my room has internet by accident...(at the head end of my bed)!!! I discovered it at Easter Weekend. It's not always working properly though, but I already can't imagine how I survived without it before.

The deans are trusting me more and more. They sign me my permissions for leaving campus in advance (like 3 permissions) and I can fill in the when, where and why when I need it. I can live with that because it means that I can kind of leave campus whenever I want without having to track one of the two deans down. Right now, I'm about to leave for the weekend (I'll spend it with Cira, Eufronio and family in Quillacollo) and for "over night absence" you need a special permission. Well, I told my dean where I wanted to go, she signed and stamped one of these papers and told me to fill it out myself. (Normally you need the person you want to visit to call or pick you up and all these official procedure steps.)

So I could actually go on and on, counting the blessings. They only thing that is missing is that they give me the keys to the dorm.... =) but I guess that won't happen. Even without keys though, I'm feeling more and more like a responsible person again and that's all I want.

Alright. I guess I'll hurry up packing my bag and heading into complete freedom :) Eufronio already payed me a visit to check if everything is alright or if I needed somebody to pick me up...
I wish you a blessed weekend and I'll be back on Monday!

And don't forget to count the blessings and thank God for each single one of them!
maria

The "No-Topic-Entry"

Oh my goodness… They’re making some noise…! The reason for it? The „Director of Student Affairs“ is paying us a visit… to check our rooms for whatever. It’s not a „shake down“ (sorry for my Miracle Meadows vocabulary), just a room check. My opinion: it’s necessary! Some kids just don’t know how to keep their rooms clean. I keep telling my three little sweet roommates to put their stuff away, to dry wet clothes OUTSIDE, NOT to place their socks on the desk, NOT to spread their rice all over their beds when they have a „chicken with rice“-feast (the food in the cafeteria is vegetarian and they are actually not supposed to bring chicken inside the dorm). Yeah… so I’m happy that brother Zabaleta is actually taking these 2 hours or something to help to improve the situation. The kids like him so I hope it might really change something. At least for some time. Some are pretty horrified though… especially the high school girls who are not supposed to have cell phones during the week or whatever… One of my roommates has her cell phone charging in the middle of the desk… Well, I told her last night to give it to the dean. She wouldn’t listen and Mr. Zabaleta spares me some nerves since I was about to talk to her tonight about the cell phone story.

Well, I’m glad though that I took my laptop to worship today since we are kind of trapped here. My room is almost the last one in the whole dorm of about 130 ladies. That’s the bad part about this “checking rooms”-story, but since I thought I would have worship tonight (Monday is “my day”) I had taken my laptop, but they had invited somebody else. Fine with me. I’m prepared for next Monday :) and I at least have somthing to do right now.

What to do with the rest of a blog I started like this? I don’t know. I just know that I don’t have to fear anything concerning room check. Our room is a chaos, but MY stuff and MY bed are alright. Well… I’m curious though, what he will say about my “kitchen”…

Since I don’t feel like eating white rice twice a day (NO JOKE!), I started to buy my own food supplies when the Germans left. I have everything you need in case you don’t feel like eating in the cafeteria : peanut butter, jam, bread, nuts, raisins, ketchup, mayonnaise, ramen noodles, granola, tea, milk powder, garlic powder, juice, whole wheat crackers, oatmeal cookies, carrots, apples, something to boil water with, knife, spoon, fork, cups, pitcher… well, just everything you need to survive! I love my new freedom. I eat less than 50% in the cafeteria and 3-4 times rice a week for 6 months is ok... Last week I had my first breakfast in my room. After worship, I managed to sneak back into the dorm and had the most wonderful and quiet breakfast since I got here. Somehow it was like a historic moment and I had to take a picture of it. Since then, I started to skip the “cafeteria breakfast” more regularly…

I’m surprised though, how much stuff I get into my locker-sized closet! It’s really amazing. Shoes, clothes, “kitchen”, dirty clothes, toilet articles… it’s just a question of organization and always putting stuff back to where it belongs. On the other hand, I really like only having what you really need. Sometimes I wish I had taken this or that item with me from Germany, but somehow I survive without it and I love this experience!

Somehow this blog is a strange one. But I can’t really focus on anything useful since I have people asking me every two minutes what I’m doing and right now I have three of them staring on my screen trying to get what I’m writing about and almost driving me crazy (with the additional sound of girls trying to play volleyball in the hallway and others screaming because of heaven knows what). At least they don’t understand a word. Sometimes I like this school system here… =) although it’s pretty sad when I don’t know how to help the kids with their English homework because the assignment is already in bad English and I don’t want to correct the teacher…

Whatever. I guess I’ll stop here for now and write some more useful blogs when I have time and nerves to actually THINK. You got a kind of first hand impression though what life in this crazy dorm looks like. *lol*

Hope you have a great day with less noise…
Good night… that means good morning for some of you.
maria

Ever visited a prison?

I know, it has been already 3 weeks that I’ve been to Santa Cruz, but I still want to dedicate one entry to the prison. For me, it wasn’t the first time in Palmasola (the prison of Santa Cruz... also see German Wikipedia). In 2003, I didn’t really know where I was going. All I knew was that the group wanted to visit the two churches in the prison with the missionaries Jenny and Heidi and that they had - obviously - survived previous visits. Since I love new experiences I said I would join them.

Everybody more or less knows how prisons are supposed to look like. Well, whatever image you have in your mind, Bolivian prisons are different. Pretty different. The picture shows the view over the part for men from the top of the church building. Yeah, it looks like a town within some fences and it doesn’t only look like it, that’s exactly what it is. It’s just a pretty dangerous town. There are pubs, a soccer field, churches, shops... You can buy and sell, play soccer or just hang around. To get in there, you either have to deal with some drugs or you have to pass a lot of check points where they search your bags, take your passports and stamp and paint your arm. This year I held the record with 5 different stamps/signs on my right arm because I wasn’t on the list they had sent there in advance. Green, blue, red, black… really nice and colorful. Just not very healthy for a white blouse on a hot day… So why did I go through all this trouble? Palmasola isn’t the safest place for a young woman! In fact, it’s the most dangerous prison in Bolivia. The police just guard the fences and might go in to get dead bodies out…

My first visit changed my curiosity into something I can’t really explain. It is this feeling when you know that you are a blessing to others but you are blessed so much yourself and humbled at the same time! It was incredible. There we were, in this town within fences, full of people I wouldn’t like to meet during day-time on the street and the faces of the brothers and sisters in the churches were beaming when they where talking about Jesus. Their stories where heartbreaking. Tragedy and joy so close together. Some of them acknowledged that they would have never found Jesus anywhere else, but what impressed me the most was that they were really waiting for Jesus to come back. I mean it’s not surprising that you’re desperately waiting for Jesus to return, knowing that you still have about 10, 15 or even more years left, but it showed me how comfortable I am on this planet earth. Am I waiting for Jesus to come back at all? Or just every now and then for 10 minutes?

This year there was a young man I will call José. 21, 5^th semester of some management career and he just landed in prison two months ago. He was a normal young student who actually didn’t drink much and wasn’t a jail candidate at all, but one night he got drunk and didn’t really know anymore what he was doing. He got angry with his best friend… and stabbed him. His friend died… I thought of the story of Ben Carson (don’t know if you ever heard of him… world famous pediatric neurosurgeon who almost stabbed his best friend being angry, too – but the belt buckle saved his friend’s life and Ben from going to jail). For José, the story ended differently... When he was telling his testimony, his voice broke. He couldn’t go on anymore. He still can’t believe what he did... but he is starting to understand what Jesus did for him. I talked to him a bit and he asked me if I had a bible for him. I had already met people in that prison who were asking me for money, but when José asked me for a bible, I spontaneously promised him to get him one and give it to Jenny before leaving Santa Cruz. On Sunday, I used my hours before flying back to Cochabamba to find a nice bible with concordance and to write him a letter. I’m praying that this bible will be a blessing for him and show him the way to a worthwhile life – even if he will have to pass a part of it in prison.

Then there was… let’s call him Jorge. I met him for the third time this year. He is the church leader in the part for men and he already impressed me when I met him for the first time in 2003. His face displays a peace… just incredible when you consider where he has lived for the past 8 years! He is one of these people you would trust your life even after only knowing him for a very short time. He’s in there for drugs… like most of the women and many men. I might see him again since he has three more years and I plan to visit the prison once more before I leave in August. It might be even scarier without my German friends, but when Jesus is talking about his true children he says: “For I was hungry, and you gave me food; I was thirsty, and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger, and you took Me in; I was naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.“ (Matthew 25:35+36)

I’ve experienced what it means to these prisoners that there are people out there who didn’t forget about them, who were willing to take the risk to visit them. That’s what makes me going back! If you get a chance to visit a prison – do it! And expect to be blessed!

Love,
maria

PS: I will return to blogging more frequently!