Nostalgia

They moved me... =( Good bye room number 35. Two and a half weeks before I'm moving out of the dorm anyways. And they separated me and Virginia since there wasn't another room with 2 free beds =( I mean there are a whole bunch of completely unoccupied rooms right now since the high school students are already on winter break, but they are expecting a lot of other people for I don't know what seminars. Well, I guess I'll just have to make the best out of it. Unfortunately, the internet connection in my room returned just last night after having abandoned me for more than 2 weeks. Would have been easier to leave believing there was no internet anyways. I don't capture this signal in my new room =( Furthermore, I'll miss my morning sun. My new room is a lot darker and the sunlight doesn't really enter. Whatever... it wasn't up to me... but I'll give the new room and my new 3 roommates (2 future teachers and a theology student) a chance! Not everything changed for the worse though. We're having less space since the room is thought for one bunk bed but they put a second one in, BUT if you're holding our breath and manage to squeeze yourself through the gap between desk and second bunk bed, you have access to a bathroom and shower that are only for us 4!! I might not want to leave it in 2.5 weeks... =)

Taking off my wall decoration almost felt like starting to say "Good bye" though. Some days ago, somebody told me that he actually likes saying "Good bye". Mmmh... still didn't get the chance to ask him why. For my part, I would prefer not having to leave. When we were going from the university to Chapare by bus (about 5-6 hours, for the camping trip), I was once again fascinated by the nature over here. Just... breathtaking!! I took pictures and videos from inside the bus, but they aren't as great as they should be to do the original justice. Bolivia is a BEAUTIFUL country - and (apart from occasions like the story of my last blog) the Bolivians are really friendly and hospitable people. Since I was in a reflective and melancholic mood watching the mountains and lakes passing by, I did my homework for my language class and wrote a 5-liner:

Nostalgia
He perdido mi corazón,
En cada esquina del mundo un pedazo.
Nunca más en esta tierra
Voy a encontrarlo en un sólo lugar.
Estoy esperando al cielo.

Nostalgia
I've lost my heart,
In every corner of this world a piece.
Never again on this earth
Will I find it in one single place.
I'm waiting for heaven.

It's not a masterpiece of poetry, but it fulfilled the criteria of my homework: capturing the feelings of a moment. My wall decoration reflected this feeling a bit. It's funny though: being in Bolivia, I even lost a piece of my heart in Brazil. Having a whole bunch of Brazilian friends makes me want to speak their language better and to get to now their country better, too. Never thought this would happen, but thanks to the jungle hike, it did. Getting reminded of the "good byes" that are soon to come by nice friends and people with really good intentions several times a day ("Amiiiga María!! Don't leave!" "When are you coming back to Bolivia?" "Are you coming back next semester?" "Why don't you just finish here??"), I've spent some melancholic (to sad) moments lately. The good side of the story: it made me not just aware of the fact that this world is not my home, but it made me really FEEL it.

I guess we need these moments that make us feel uncomfortable in this world in one way or the other every now and then. I hope my Brazilian friend will change his opinion though, because I know he's looking for heaven and there will be no "good byes", at least not of the kind that we were talking about.

Hoping to see you over there, too.
maria